Eeeek! Couples Counseling! We all know the stigma around counseling, but especially couples counseling!? Yikes! We hear things like, “Did he cheat?” “Who had the affair?” “Are you getting a divorce?” “Wow, things must be bad!”
Sometimes, yes, things are THAT bad.
But they don’t have to be! I truly believe that all couples can benefit from a version of counseling. Whether that is reading relationship books together, planning date nights to talk about the relationship, or working with a helping professional.
Couples Counseling can help highlight areas of both strength and weakness in the relationship. It can also help deepen our understanding of self and our partner. Working with a qualified Couples counselor, you gain the advantage of having a third party in the room with you, who can help identify unhelpful thoughts, reactions, and perspectives.
Couples Counseling is different from Individual counseling in that it focuses on the relationship. Areas of focus can include how each person is showing up to the relationship, and how has the relationship been prioritized and cared for.
While every couple experiences different shifts in their marriage and issues that are unique to them, here are five common themes that can help identify the right time to enter into couples therapy:
There is a communication issue, and it is not getting better with the books and podcasts you've incorporated into your life.
The same fight keeps happening and it is over “something small.”
There is a disconnect between you and your partner.
You are considering what life might be like without your partner.
You have thrown in the “towel” and stopped trying to resolve issues
Being in and maintaining a relationship is hard! Trying to live your life with another person and deal with all the layers of life (parents, in-laws, tiny humans, work, finances) is tough. But even though it can be difficult--and sometimes you might dream about your single days-- it does not have to be a struggle. You do not need to scream or cry or shut down. You can find a way to live in peace with yourself and with your partner.
Couples Therapy can help deepen your connection and love. Why not give that a try?
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